Au revoir Revoir

That low rent pile of shite the Mail is at it again.

Yes, it’s Sachsgate once more but this time ace reporter Paul Revoir has surpassed himself and most of the other hacks on the paper.

The article has a Twitpic photo of Ross with some showbiz chums.

Revoir’s copy reads:

Ross and Brand have responded defiantly by posting a photograph on the internet of themselves in high spirits with a group of friends, giving the impression that they ‘couldn’t care less’ about the furore.

I really can’t see any defiance in either the photo or even the act of posting it.

Ross posts a lot of photos on Twitpic which are immensely boring – just like the one used in the Mail today – but have no ‘agenda’ as far as I can see.

Yet Revoir somehow gets beneath the merely visual with intrepid zeal, licks the end of his ‘Young Reporter’s’ pencil and extrapolates a whole fictitious scenario of these evil-doers posing defiantly for the camera like some modern-day Bonny and Clyde.

Besides, what does he expect Ross to do?

Not enjoy himself with friends?

Sit at home scourging himself?

Stay in bed all day moping?

Of course not, but Revoir has obviously taken all this a grudge too far.

But, here’s an idea for Baron Dacre at Mail Towers that I offer in a spirit of bonhomie and with the purpose of improving the standard of his paper’s ‘news’ reporting.

When you’re sorting out who to interview for a staff reporting job, send each prospective candidate a piece of paper with 3 dots on it numbered from 1 to 3, laid out in a triangle.

If someone sends you back a picture of a triangle, let them have an interview.

If someone sends you back a picture of an ormolu clock, tell the cunt to get lost.


In the meantime, Baron, before this new interview filter is put in place, you might as well get rid of a few of the cunts you already have working at the Mail.

Might I suggest Paul Revoir for a start?