Iain Dale – is he a homeless person?

He seems to be in permanent residence in the BBC’s Radio 5 Live studios.
I have a room to rent that you can share with a lodger who says he’s Derek Draper.
Interested, Iain?

Iain Dale, Esther Rantzen, 15 sheep and Nadine Dorries’ vomit

You might need one of these later

As regular visitors to this blog will be aware, I am not a member of either the Esther Rantzen or the Iain Dale fan club.

However, I have softened towards she of the teeth since Iain Dale has featured her in two recent and consecutive bitchfests entries on his blog – here and here.

I don’t know what Esther’s done to Iain, but she’s not exactly his favourite person at the moment, whatever it was.*

Couple this together with a couple of missing sheep articles and you’re forced to the conclusion that maybe something really is loose in Iain’s top pasture this week.

Fair play to him though.

This line in his fawning fascinating Daley Dozen list of blogs had me sniggering in a gratuitously smutty way:

10. Nadine fingers Pat McFadden as the ultimate man in a grey suit.

Then, being unable to resist a quick click though to Iain’s chum Mad Nad’s little corner of Planet Blog, I discovered this gem.

It deserves quoting in its entirety:

How to make an MP vomit

I haven’t broken up yet and whilst working in Parliament yesterday, noticed lots of other MPs working too.

Today I have been to ‘Fusion’, a summer holiday activity scheme run by Ampthill Baptist Church and its amazing staff and volunteers.

I think it’s probably the best summer play scheme I have ever been to and I’ve run plenty myself in the past.

Can you imagine the wall of noise as you walk into a room where there are 115 children laughing?

The activities are fast and furious. One almost caught me out though. Following on from a huge wall mounted Wii session, the teams were invited to win an additional 5 points. To do this a team member had to suck custard through a sock, that so, so almost got me!!

Last year they bought 160 catering cans of baked beans for one activity!

They really are all crazy mad at ABC!

The dedication of the staff was something else, after the children had left the staff remain behind rehearsing, planning and a big group de-brief. No one in any particular hurry to get home.

I loved it. I loved the prayer at the end of the session too.

‘Let God’s light shine out of us and onto everyone we meet’.

Thanks Adrian. I’ve completely, totally failed in that one a number of times over the last year.

Well done to all at ABC, you all deserve a medal.

Just visited a poorly constituent and off to the Marston Vale centre next.

Don’t worry. I’m no martyr, my month break beckons with relish.

I don’t know about making an MP vomit, but I very nearly upchucked lunch’s bacon, Brie and rocket sandwiches when I read it…

I’d fisk the whole thing if it wasn’t for the fact that I’m fond of my stomach lining…but not that fond of it that I want to see it in front of me…

*I know there are people reading this who like a punt, so the odds on possible reasons for Iain’s antipathy towards Esther read as follows:

2-1 Esther makes more TV appearances than Iain

5-1 Esther has more hair than Iain

10-1 – It’s too much of an effort writing yet another sycophantic tribute to some troughing MP chum who’s just decided to stand down at the next election

Some blogging bollocks

Although Al Jahom’s excellent and very eclectic blog has been in my blogroll for a while, I’ve never actually given it the official bigging up that it deserves.

So, here goes – and cash is never refused, AJ…

Al Jahom’s blog has a great deal to recommend it: topical comment, great music, humour, pointy squirty cars, foul language and it always adopts a viewpoint that’s guaranteed to get you thinking.

Bookmark the bastard – now – or even do something geeky with that fucking RSS whosit that I always ignore.

Those gods of the blogosphere, the ever excellent Boatang and Demetriou, have been blogging like muthafuckas lately.

Messrs B&D never disappoint and this latest article on the LPUK is essential reading for anyone interested in UK Libertarianism and its future after the recent by-election in Norwich North.

I hate to compliment the twin godhead of B&D any further, but they’ve recently highlighted an interesting point that will have significant implications for the future of blogging and political internet comment in general, and they seem to have beaten several people to the idea since I’ve seen several bloggers cover this after B&D.

A recent article of theirs queries the position of bloggers like Guido and Iain Dale after the next election when David ‘Bullingdon’ Cameron and his band of bastards Merry Men will sweep to victory – and sweep to victory they will; I’m 100% positive.

At the moment, Guido appears to hold a sort of centrist anti-establishment position although – inevitably with Labour in power as it makes better reading – he seems more critical of the Left. He claims to be impartial, but some Libertarian bloggers have their doubts and suggest he might lean further to the right with a Tory victory. Dale is obviously going to keep his Tory stance and it will be interesting to see if he finds Tory activity as equally blog-worthy as he does at present regarding Labour’s fumblings.

You see, it’s all a matter of your political stance – if you blog from a position of diametrically contrary opposition then when your party gets in what are you going to do then?

Bash the opposition? That’s a bit easy and rather lame.

Shower praise on your party? Boring and boorish – and one thing Guido and Dale don’t want to do is lose any of their page views which is what will happen if they both go for a Tory cluster wank…

If Guido and Dale do lose their oppositional motivation then they’re going to be Tory mouthpieces and hence part of the MSM, which blogging was never intended to be.

It may be that it’s a natural evoloutionary step for blogging to go mainstream, but it doesn’t have to be that way.

Rest assured that the better bloggers – two of whom are mentioned at the top of this piece – aren’t going to sell their souls to the MSM and water down their opinions, and neither am I.

As I blogged previously, a cunt is a cunt no matter who they are or what they believe.

Stick around to see them outed.

It’s our mission from Jeebus…

MPs’ expenses – now they want sympathy

Nadine Dorries – troughing cunt

The BBC radio documentary ‘The MPs’ Story‘ aired on Monday.

Some of those interviewed seem to have seen this as an opportunity to gain some sympathy from the public, but they’re not getting any from this taxpayer.

Nadine Dorries had something to say (there’s a BIG fucking surprise) and she’s even blogged about it here.

I was very proud of my daughter who became upset during the interview and I regretted letting her contribute, but really, she was just one of hundreds of children and families who were all experiencing the exact same feelings and emotion.

The heartstring tugging was continued by that well-known Tory blogger Iain Dale :

Earlier today Radio 4 broadcast a half hour programme on the MP expenses scandal. It is a close look at the effect the scandal had on MPs and their families. Among others, it features Nadine Dorries, Ann Cryer, Denis MacShane and Andrew George. Nadine’s daughter breaks down in tears when discussing the effect it all had on her, and Nadine openly discusses the fact that she has thought about standing down. She has also blogged about the programme HERE.

I suspect that many people will have an adverse reaction to the programme and accuse the MPs of shedding crocodile tears and think they deserved all they got. Many did. But several of the MPs featured in this programme were clearly driven to the edge of reason by what happened.

For fuck’s sake, Iain, how far up Dorries’ arse are you prepared to stick your fucking tongue?

Dale even comments on his own blog entry when he finds his readers are rather less than sympathetic or not quite as enamoured of the taste of Mad Nad’s duodenum quite as much as he is:

You are all writing as if all were as guilty as each other. If that were true I’d have more sympathy with what you are all writing. The fact is that some MPs deserved all they got, and others didn’t. Andrew George, who features in this programme, I would venture to suggest is one who was traduced with very little reason. Don’t tarr them all with the same brush – that’s all I am saying.

Yes, Iain baby, but they were all complicit in covering up the troughing that was going on – ergo, they are all guilty.

Anyway, I don’t know about you, but I really couldn’t give a fuck about any of the greedy troughing cunts or their families.

They still don’t fucking get it and any shit they’ve brought down on their families should be regarded as no different from that inflicted on his family by any career criminal.

The overwhelming fucking pity of all this is that none of the fuckers seem to be paying for their crimes.

A few thousand quid given back here and there and that makes it all right as far as they’re concerned.

It doesn’t, you weasel-felching motherfuckers and let’s hope you get that message loud and fucking clear come the General Election.

If this doesn’t get sorted then, it’ll be lamppost and piano wire time come about 2012…

Cunts.

Iain Dale fail

I don’t normally discuss specific blogs – except when I want to point out something positive.

I usually stick to generalisations when I’m criticising them.

However, Iain Dale’s blog seems to be copping some flak recently regarding Mad Nad Dorries, Julie ‘fiddling for a roof’ Kirkbride and now Alan ‘expenses are great, innit’ Duncan.

Tomorrow I am going to be interviewing Alan Duncan for Total Politics. Feel free to suggest questions you’d like me to ask him.

And then the fun starts.

Here’s a selection of the questions I don’t think Dale will be asking Duncan…

Are the flowers planted by Pound Force still in your lawn?

Can he see any conflict between compassionate conservatism as espoused by David Cameron and the values sought by Marc Rich in employees of his oil trading organisation?

Do you regret your remarks about murdering Miss California?!

Why did he act like such a smug cock about his expenses on HIGNFY?

Do you think people believe your tan is real ?

Because she paid her taxes, my mother gets an old age pension of £95 a week. By dint of thrift she has a private income of just under £5,000 a year which means that her pension is clawed back by £45 a month. Why is my mother’s income taxed so that MPs earning £68,000 a year can have free groceries worth £100 a week?

“After your performance on ‘Have I Got News For You’ why do you think that David Cameron has not withdrawn the whip”

Given that pretty well all the questions posed so far severely challenge your morality and your judgement, please can you provide your justification for continuing in office as an MP and Shadow Leader of the House, and one good reason why you should not be voted out at the next election.

An important question…

…well, to me at least.

Why would a well-known Libertarian blog have ‘Iain Dale’s Diary’ listed under ‘Free Thinkers’?

I don’t think I’ve read so many blinkered Toryphiliac posts in one place.

Acid test – ID still thinks Nadine Dorries is sane.

Hmmmphhh…

UPDATE – 27-05-09

Dale is now posting in defence of Ann Kirkbride.

Which prompts me to ask – how long now before Dale himself becomes an embarrassment to the Tory party?

Besides, describing Kirkbride as as a ‘young woman’ is justification enough to make you query Dale’s powers of observation – particularly regarding the female form.

(Not that he’s an expert in such matters…)

She’s actually 2 years older than him.

Ah…maybe that’s Dale just trying stay youthful.

Nice.

Balls to the wall tomorrow?

According to Iain Dale it may be the turn of Ed Balls and his missus to get named and shamed in the Torygraph tomorrow.

Could this be the big one?

Let’s hope so!

Dave and Dale Fail

…nah…

I see Iain Dale’s quote of the day comes from Dave Cameron:

“I was elected by you to give a lead and I am now doing just that.”

I didn’t think Iain would be quite so easily pleased.

Is this a typical Tory attitude?

If so, epic fail.

As far as I can see it’s just a mild bit of wrist slapping from someone who hasn’t got the cojones to do what anyone who calls themselves a leader should have done as soon as this expenses sleaze started oozing out from the Torygraph.

Where are the sackings?

The withdrawls of the whip?

The signs of firm leadership?

Not anywhere within sniffing distance of Cameron, that’s for sure…

Another epic fail.

Nothing to see here.

Not a fucking sausage…

And all Brown has to do is sack a couple of sacrificial pigs and he’s trumped Cameron.