“How to Talk to a Climate Skeptic”

There was a time when you’d have to do something pretty fucking serious to bring social opprobium upon yourself.

I mean serious shit; like beating your wife, mugging an old lady for her pension or your kids getting into trouble.

Nowadays, however, it’s all changed and as far as I can see, you now have three new transgressions that are likely to get you shunned in most social circles:

1) Stating that even though someone, for sake of argument, might have a hook for a hand, be transsexual, come from a different ethnic group to your own or is in any way different to you, they can still be a cunt.

Not because they’re different, but because a cunt is a cunt is a cunt – as Gertrude Stein once wrote.

Being a cunt just slices across ethnic, social, cultural, political, physical and religious boundaries.

Anyone can be a cunt – and, be warned, there’s thousands of the fuckers around and many of them are protected by law.

2) You smoke.

This really is the new ‘addiction’ monster paraded to scare people. It’s replaced drinking alcohol and jacking up heroin as being the single worst thing a person can do to their body and not only do you harm yourself, you kill others around you with second hand smoke – a fact not proven by anyone of any scientific reputability so far – and you also produce third hand smoke.

Yes, third hand smoke.

Read it and weep – and then cry because so-called serious scientists who help to form government policies which become bad laws can also be cunts…(see #1) above)

This brings me on nicely to:

3) You’re a climate change sceptic.

Now, this really is serious shit, because you’re not just insulting someone (however much they deserve it) or even jeopardising their health, you’re destroying the whole fucking planet.

Yes, you, you selfish and utter cunt – unwittingly you are now in category #1.

But without any legal redress whatsoever.

Because you are an unbeliever.

This is the new religion for the 21st century – the new dogma – the basis of a new Inquisition; snooping in your rubbish bin, curbing your freedom of movement, impinging on your lifestyle and when you have sinned you can buy your way to redemption through the indulgence of the holy carbon offset or by recycling your empty alcopops bottles.

Start to object, criticise, question, even, and you’re going straight to climate change sceptic HELL.

(Oh, are you going to fucking burn, you bastard.)

So tainted are we heretics that the apostles of Gore have devised many answers to the naive and petty questions we ask.

Here, in a handy list, are all the questions we will want to ask and all the answers we can ever want to hear under the heading of  “How to Talk to a Climate Skeptic ” by one Coby Beck (file under #1 above).

That, my fellow sinners, is one fuck of a long list.

It’s worthy of the Jesuits or the Scientologers or the Moonies.

It has headings such as ‘Stages of Denial’ – ‘Types of Argument’ – ‘Levels of Sophistication’…

Then there are the questions and concerns Mr Beck thinks someone who walks round in shoes made of muesli should be addressing and asking us as we luxuriate in our dirty sins and which are supposed to convert us to the right path one by one.

Here’s a sample – a very small sample:

Water vapor accounts for almost all of the greenhouse effect
There is no proof that CO2 is causing global warming
CO2 doesn’t lead, it lags
CO2 in the air comes mostly from volcanoes
What about mid-century cooling?
Geological history does not support CO2’s importance

It really does look like the ‘how to convert’ pages from some religious cult manual.

But nowhere does it ask two rather pertinent questions – to me, at least.

1) Aren’t many people making a shitload of money on the back of climate change concern?

2) Can anyone think of a better way to enforce social control?

Think about it…there’s a whole new technology coming out of this with all manner of opportunities for people to trouser fucking tons of cash and there’s all sorts of ways in which people can be monitored, observed and regulated even more than they are already.

It’s possibly the biggest hoax ever perpetrated by mankind and it’s going to affect all of us for years and years to come. It’s going to halt economic recovery, it’s going to place restrictions on us that are going to have a profound effect on our everyday lives and it’s going to cost every one of us who pays tax more – a lot more.

It’s not even as if there aren’t scientists who offer the alternative point of view – that climate change isn’t man made and that it’s as natural as the sun rising and setting and the tides ebbing and flowing.

But no, all oppositional debate is drowned out by cries of ‘vested interests’, ‘denial’ and ‘crackpot theories’.

Anyway, come what may, I shall still continue to call a cunt a cunt, smoke – if only to annoy prissy bastards who inhale more shit than I produce from their own fucking car – and refuse to get suckered in by the climate change clergy.

Fuck them and their carbon offset scams.

I’m already seeing my personal freedoms and liberties taken away on an almost daily basis.

Enough is enough.

So, how should you talk to a climate change sceptic?

Pretty fucking carefully if you don’t want a solar panel rammed up your arse…

Meet the new boss…

Somewhat predictably, the series of G20 protests in London seems to have failed to start peacefully, with some of the RBS building’s windows being broken and missiles thrown at the police.

However, if that’s the worst that happens before the protests are through then that’s not too high a price to pay for free speech, not that free speech will be around much if some of the people behind the protesters get their way.

This isn’t really about a motley bunch of anarchists or Trots sounding off against capitalism, it really isn’t.

That’s just camouflage as far as the brains behind it are concerned.

The vast majority of the people in that crowd are just poor bloody cannon fodder.

Once more the ‘Man’ is pushing the buttons and hitting the switches but this time it isn’t the businessmen or the politicians who are pulling the strings.

Instead, it’s the academics and the radical Greens who are pushing their climate change agenda, despite a lack of sound and unequivocal scientific evidence.

This would mean massive and totally unnecessary restrictions on everyone’s lifestyles and the suppression of dissent from anyone who disagrees with them.

And surely, when one of today’s protest leaders can be described as an ‘anarchist professor’ the alarm bells should start ringing in everyone’s head really fucking loudly.

Authoritarianism can be any colour.

Brown, black, red…

…and now it’s going green.

Earth Hour – more eco-bollocks

FFS!

Isn’t it time we told these fuckers to stop all this hectoring, condescending,  puerile crap?

Earth Hour is happening tonight…when everyone who turns off their lights for an hour at 8.30 PM local time is voting for the Earth and everyone who doesn’t is voting  for global warming.

How dare they take my right to turn on my lights wherever and whenever I please and twist it into some sort of statement about my beliefs!

It’s dark at 8.30 PM this time of year and I’m fucked if I’m going to sit in darkness like some sort of urban troglodyte because I don’t want to be thought of as a planet destroyer.

I’m paying for the facility to turn my dark environment into a lighted one – it’s called living in the modern world.

Yes, I could light a candle but when I can turn on a light at the flick of a switch, why the fuck should I?

(I wonder how many extra house fires will have to be extinguished tonight at about 8.40 PM?)

For what it’s worth, as may be fairly obvious, I’m a climate change sceptic but I don’t agree with waste, so I recycle, turn off lights and appliances when I don’t need them and thus achieve the same ends without the blind acceptance of what seems to be the 21st century’s new religion with its attendant zealots, preachers and hypocrites.

I’m convinced that a few people are making serious, serious money from this whole climate change issue and that the general public are once more being conned left, right and center so that these few people can line their pockets at our expense.

I realise that by taking this stance I’m a bad person and that I’m bound for eco-Hell but I don’t fucking care.

My lights will be on at 8.30 PM tonight – not all the ones in the house, just the ones I need.

No doubt I shall have the TV and/or DVD player on, too.

Maybe a table lamp as well.

Join me in the light…

It would have been too easy to call this entry ‘Plain Stupid’ so I won’t

Time for another confession.

I’m not incredibly taken with the climate change lobby.

It strikes me that it’s just too simplistic to attribute the changing climate to one factor – carbon emissions – when the weather itself is such a complex system. It doesn’t make sense to me on a scientific level.

What I do agree with, however, is that we shouldn’t waste this planet’s limited resources, so I guess that the campaigners and I are probably going to achieve the same ends in the long run.

Which brings me to this.

The climate action group Plane Stupid organised a protest at Stansted today – forcing dozens of flights to be cancelled and thousands of passengers consequently stranded at the airport.

Several thoughts and questions occur to me…

What chronic lack of security allowed nearly 60 protesters into a secure area along with concrete blocks and their own security fencing?

Isn’t it irresponsible to ‘test’ security in this way post 9/11?

Why did it take 5 hours to clear the runway and then arrest 57 people?

Why does Plane Stupid think that by inconveniencing people and disrupting their travel plans that those same people are going to support their cause?

Surely you need Joe Public on your side if you’re going to bring about any change in the government’s policies or the airports’ and airlines’ operating procedures?

Why alienate those you really need on your side?

Is the British public ever likely to respond to such ‘direct action’ methods?

To be honest, I don’t think they’ve ever been or ever will be the cause of any sympathetic resonance within the national psyche, added to which our political system doesn’t have a fast response time when it comes to public pressure. The gears of government rotate and engage very slowly.

To put it bluntly, all I think that Plane Stupid have done is to piss off a bunch of ordinary people that just wanted to get on with their journeys and didn’t get the message at all.

Perhaps their cause is a good one – it’s certainly one which a great many people share – but their methods really stink.

I suppose that what really irritates me – not being affected by the protest –  is crap like this from one of the protesters:

“We’re afraid of what the police might do to us, we’re afraid of going to jail but nothing scares us as much as the threat of runaway climate change.”

Afraid of the police FFS?

This isn’t China, Zimbabwe or Burma!

They’re not going to be beaten up or have electrodes attached to their genitalia and then after a show trial get lashed to a stake in front of a firing squad.

No, it’ll be a court appearance – maybe – and if so, maybe a small fine or some community service. Odds are that they’ll just be cautioned with maybe one or two people facing a criminal damage charge. Talk about self-delusion…

The fact that they can protest without any harsh penalty says more about the continued tolerance of our society than it does about their own.

Meanwhile Plane Stupid has apologised to passengers for the disruption.

Oh, that’s OK then…

Lest it be said that I’m just ranting and not putting forward any constructive ideas, how about this?

One medium haul flight alone emits about 700 tons of CO2, so how about stopping the empty and half empty flights that the major airlines have to schedule so that their slots stay open at the airports?

Legislate against this and then leave Aunty Aggie to fly to visit her daughter in Dublin in peace.

There, sorted.