Black holes, white holes and assholes

I’m no Stephen Hawking but, as I understand it, all this black hole stuff is quite simple really.

It’s all due to a collapsed star that has such a strong gravitational pull, due to its super-massive composition, that not even light can escape from it and everything gets sucked in.

Rather like the current Tory Party – except it’s not what gets sucked in, but what doesn’t get blown out.

Let me explain.

The Labour Party is all but dead because it’s making itself more unelectable with every passing day.

Economic ineptitude, MPs’ expenses, the Red Rag/sleaze campaign, the Gurkhas defeat, Brown on You Tube, cabinet members saying that they don’t want to be Brown’s successor when all they’re doing is really floating the idea, rapid erosion of civil liberties and  other embarrassments all mean that the next General Election will see Labour out.

There’s no way I’m voting Labour again for an eleventh time so my vote is up for grabs.

I’m sure Dave would like it.

But Dave’s not saying anything.

There’s a black hole there that makes a few disapproving noises at Labour but nothing of any substance comes out of it – so I guess it’s probably a white hole really which is supposed to eject stuff, but this one is obviously broken.

Where’s some ideas, for fuck’s sake?

How are Dave and George and all the rest of the chaps going to rescue our economy, clean up corruption in Parliament, give us back our basic freedoms and give this country some direction?

There must be lots of people like me – disillusioned Labour voters – so isn’t it about time they gave us some clue about what they’re going to do?

I’d hate to stop voting for one load of assholes and then just help to vote another load in…

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