Fuck You in the Super U

Living in France sometimes has its surreal side.

Take today, for example…

There I am in the Super U in Pouance buying bread and some pate for lunch. It’s fairly quiet although there’s piped musical pap playing in the background.

And then I hear something I actually like.

It’s a track by Cee Lo Green (who some joker once informed me is Hughie Green’s grandson) that was a hit a few months ago.

 

 

I like it because it reminds me of some of the Philly stuff Ifrom the 1970s. It’s great, in fact – good arrangement, fantastic voice…

But the lyrics are somehow different.

He’s singing the ‘alternative’ version.

Here’s what I’ve heard before and was expecting to hear again:

 

 

And here’s what I actually heard:

 

Of course, as far as the French are concerned it’s just a song sung in a foreign language so it’s not at all offensive.

All the same, it amused me to see grannies and mums with kids shopping whilst old Cee Lo was singing ’Fuck you and fuck her too’…

Dragonflies, swallows and kir petillant

And still France continues to share its wild life secrets…

A few hours ago, we were sitting outside – taking a smoke and drinks break before yet another stage of the fucking interminable process of putting together an Ikea Hemnes wardrobe – when Mrs Shark exclaimed that she’d just seen the biggest hornet ever.

Closer examination of the ‘hornet’ revealed that it was, in fact, this:

It’s a Broad-bodied Chaser – or so Google has reliably informed me – a female.

Never seen one of those before.

Amazing wings – almost like Tiffany glass…

Whilst I was typing the first part of this blog entry – sitting in the dining room with a JPS 100 and another (sic) nice glass of kir petillant – there was a great commotion when a swallow flew in through the doors and Oscar caught it.

As far as we know, this is the first bird that he’s ever actually managed to get between his jaws.

I managed to get it off him and – fortunately – it seemed remarkably unphased and uninjured and flew off out of my hands when I took it outside.

My god, but it was beautiful…

I feel doubly blessed now – and, after my fourth glass of kir – very full of honhomie.

Just call me Mr Congeniality…

…better had, or I’ll twat you one…

Footnote: the photo was taken by me with a Panasonic Lumix DMC-TZ5 compact camera.

Does vinegar make you shit?

Apologies to those familiar with this, but for people reading this who don’t blog, I need to explain something about a blog account.

No matter what blog client you use, you get access to a ‘dashboard’ or control panel that has all sorts of good and useful shit in it.

One of the handiest things in it is some sort of stats view and summary so you can see how people have found your blog, what’s been popular that you’ve written, where they’ve gone that you’ve linked to and stuff like that which is really much more interesting than it sounds.

One group of statistics tells me what search terms people have used to find my blog and I was delighted to find that someone had come here by searching for:

‘does vinegar make you shit’

I know that they didn’t find the answer here, so:

Does vinegar make you shit?

Enquiring minds need to know...