Halifax TV ad fuckery

Captureisa

One of the benefits of writing a blog, as far as I’m concerned anyway, is having an outlet for ranting at all manner of annoyances, irritations and bugbears. These may not be a problem to the reader but it’s my blog, so tough shit.

Today, it’s the turn of…

…TV adverts…

Useful for taking time out to put the kettle on/have a piss/feed the cat/pour another glass of wine/order a takeaway/have a wank but mostly indispensible and easily screened out if you’re in the same room when they’re on.

Of course, there are exceptions to this when a TV advert is either very good or very bad.

Generally speaking, Guinness adverts are usually worth watching, as well as some of the better Honda adverts. Some are even good because they’re so bad – the Shake ‘N’ Vac advert of a few years ago is a good example.

However, many are just so amazingly and obviously awful – indeed, Kellogg’s don’t seem to have made a decent advert ever as far as I can see. Then there’s the mind-numbing Clairol/Oil of Olay/Maybelline cosmetics ads (surely some women can’t be that gullible) and most car adverts (surely some men can’t be that gullible) often make me wonder what drugs ad agency staff are ingesting.

Whatever new high they’ve scored from their local sink estate drugs lab should be named so that it can be avoided and something comparatively harmless like a heroin and PCP speedball be safely injected.

However, there seems to be an increasing number of TV adverts which just seem downright fucking pointless and make me wonder exactly what goes through the minds of the people who commission, devise, approve and finance them.

The prime example of this and the most irritating of all is the current series of adverts for the Halifax.

I’ve seen 4 different ones; all, apparently, featuring Halifax staff.

They’re set in a radio station which doesn’t exist and feature Halifax employees being ‘groovy’ with a very limited amount of success. Why a radio station, for fucking fuck’s sake?

What the fuck has this got to do with banks?

What does some overweight ginger shithead blathering into a microphone tell me about the Halifax’s products? Or some vacuous bint twitching her head and singing ‘Isa, Isa baby’? Or some airhead spilling her tea over a mixing console that isn’t actually hooked up to anything else and that represents a bank clerk’s annual salary?

And all this to convince the great British public that an Isa will offer them a good return on their investment and that a free fiver a month is enough to persuade them to deposit their monthly salary in a Halifax current account.

Apart from trying to get your custom I reckon that the other purpose of this campaign is make the a bank look all ‘cuddly’ after the reputation of banks plummeted during the ‘credit crunch’ and all the associated turmoil – bail outs, bonuses and other financial fuckery.

But you know what really fucking pisses me off about these adverts? It’s that some overpaid, under-educated fucking shit-for-brains bell-end thought that the British public would actually swallow this shower of arse gravy.

And do you know what pisses me off even more? It’s that in many cases they probably thought right…

About these ads

13 Responses

  1. Couldn’t agree more.

    I’ve often wondered what those ads were about….and why.

  2. Hit the nail right on the fucking head…some overpaid knob in a pr agency is being paid loads a money to produce…ermm what a wheel barra load of shite…

    I turn over when ads come on then turn back they annoy me..pleasse get this published the public would love it!!!

  3. I’m just glad I don’t have an account with the Halifax!

    All those people whose salaries I’m helping to fund pissing about in some totally imaginary radio station when they should be looking after my money and thanking baby Jeebus that they haven’t all been thrown out of a job but were, instead, saved by the big bank bail out which I, as a taxpayer, funded.

    It’s a fucking insult.

    The next TV bank advert I want to see is a vast Victorian workhouse in which the bank employees are lined up sitting at desks working away at huge fucking ledgers with quill pens whilst some huge ugly bastard towers over them with a great big fuck-off whip with which he smites them if they stop working.

    Play on your own fucking dollar – not on mine.

    Bastards.

  4. Why on earth do people have to use the proverbial ‘F ‘word and such all the while?
    Lets be different Huh and be nice to each other. I like the advert and especially the latest one with the blonde girl, she is lovely

  5. Yeah, I’d fuck her.

  6. Oh dear! Ad actually makes me laugh. Minority of one obviously. See ghastly call centre. Guy working on ordered Isa script. And coworker taking the piss. Bloke trying to maintain equilibrium. Cute grin. How shallow. won’t shop Halifax. But heyho! Will batten down hatches for F replies…

  7. Oh! so it`s not just me then. `Isa Isa Baby` as she stares at the keyboard like a bleeding psycopath. She stares into the eyes of the gentleman (her next victim) and does the old bit with her neck, and says `ISA ISA `like shes wanting to give him a blow job! . Honestly, if you had some money to invest, would anybody (after the banking system screwed our world economy) be seduced into investing with the Halifax? Its looks like it`s run by a bunch of kids who think of nothing else but music. You know, just like your own irresponsible children. And THEY want you to entrust your money with them?? NO F*****G CHANCE, excuse my French.

  8. Oh! so it`s not just me then. `Isa Isa Baby` as she stares at the keyboard like a bleeding psycopath. She stares into the eyes of the gentleman (her next victim) and does the old bit with her neck, and says `ISA ISA `like shes wanting to give him a blow job! . Honestly, if you had some money to invest, would anybody (after the banking system screwed our world economy) be seduced into investing with the Halifax? Its looks like it`s run by a bunch of kids who think of nothing else but music. You know, just like your own irresponsible children. And THEY want you to entrust your money with them?? NO CHANCE !

  9. i love the new HALIFAX ADS. who cares if its in an imaginary studio.i dont bank with them will never buy a house from them so there not working on me,but i love em.
    the best ad is the ad for ads,the dog in the dogs home,he plays a cd of homself and packs his own bag,i dont have a problem with that.bet you do.

  10. No, I don’t have a problem with the dog ad. It’s one of the better offerings as far as adverts go – especially the full unedited version.

    However, what I do have a problem with is people who tell me what I have a problem with.

    All too often they’re dead wrong.

  11. peter carrol and others who comment about the blond bitch…u tossers are on the wrong site…go fuck of to ur pointless porn sites u weirdos
    halifax ads are all fucking shit and annoying beyond belief…nuff said

  12. Are you a nihilist?

  13. Halifax,’the bank that gives you extra’. Yeah, the £1 per day overdraft charge,the greedy cruel bastards.

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