Give me another cigarette!

FFS…
“When you think of someone who smokes Benson and Hedges or Marlboro, there are very different images – the sophisticate versus the cowboy. Take that away and you don’t have people expressing identity through cigarette brands.”
Patronising cocksores.

“I’ve not had a drink today, officer.”

Pisshead ex-judge Bruce ‘Sober as a judge’ Macmillan is in the news again.
A little closer to a prison term (not that he’ll get one, he used to be a judge) but neatly exposed for the cunt that he undoubtedly is:
Prosecutor Adrian Hollanby told the court that when officers stopped Macmillan they found the vodka and [...]

Banning the tanning

It beats me why some people hold having a tan in such high regard, but if someone wants to look like a giant fucking satsuma with legs then good luck to them.
Now, however, if you get a suntan artificially it looks as if you’re soon going to find your options restricted.
The Welsh Assembly looks set [...]

There’s no such thing as a Freeview lunch

If you have a Freeview box and you watch TV through it then, unless you’ve been living in a fucking cave for the last week, you’ll be aware that you have to rescan it today to continue receiving the stations you’re used to.
If you don’t, then  a plague of little transistorised insects will emerge from [...]

It’s ‘cos they is black, innit?

Phone beats gun? Yes, but only if you have the ‘iBust a cap in yo ass’ app…
I had a rough night last night.
A combination of coughing up the odd lung or two in the aftermath of the ‘cold from hell’, and our two Maine Coons wanting to play with their feathery sticks at 4am conspired [...]

How to get fucked in Brighton

‘Maggie. I really am fucked this time, aren’t I?’
‘Just wave, you cunt.’
Well, it’s the day after the Labour Conference’s ‘Big Day’ – Gordon’s speech – and the aftermath looks like the political equivalent of a Trident nuclear missile scoring a direct hit on a sewage farm.
There’s SHIT everywhere.
Of course, Labour stalwarts are saying that there’s [...]

More Stephen Pound stretching…

Media whore Pound
I’ve just found this.
Yes, Stephen Pound MP again.
But once you’ve got a cunt hooked, best not to let him go, eh?
He was against the smoking ban:
I’ll admit that there was a bit of the Jeremy Clarkson in my protest as the anti-smokers were, in the main, a po-faced bunch who seemed bent on [...]

Stephen Pound speaks – yet again

Makes you want to blow chunks, doesn’t it?
Stephen Pound MP – that well-known media whore shrinking violet – was on Radio 5 Live last night on the Nolan phone-in show.
He referred to:
The foul foetid reeking swamp of the blogosphere
I guess I might well be part of that due to articles like this.
I fucking hope so.
Strange, [...]

The mole, the MoD and the maggot

Need a piss?…get in the fucking queue…
Being a cynical cunt sort of chap I’ve never thought that the Daily Telegraph was motivated by anything other than the prospect of boosting its circulation figures when it broke and covered the story of MPs’ expenses earlier this year.
But the paper’s cluster wanking isn’t over yet.
No, the journalistic [...]

One for the Count – Green on Red

This is for Count Druncula…
The Paisley Underground was pretty influential on what’s come to be known as alt-country and at the fringes of it was a band called Green on Red, who – like so many great US acts – were very successful here and in Europe but less so in Usania.
Green on Red weren’t [...]